Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
