So gin and wine won't be happening again
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Randomize