The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
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