I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
