Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I want a musical about memes.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
