Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I supernannyed him into submission
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
