he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize