were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
