I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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