Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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