I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize