She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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