Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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