adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
