So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
wow bdsm is so cute
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
