I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
It's rum buckets o'clock
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
