so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
