I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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