he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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