Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
