two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
