i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
