she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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