Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
