How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
