All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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