the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
farters have to be the big spoon...
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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