we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
