That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
So vagazzling was a success
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
