What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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