what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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