Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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