You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you would pick up someone in the library
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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