there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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