I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
