Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
