So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
