im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
