How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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