Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize