i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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