I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize