Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize