actually, I'm a sock model
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
