idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
