so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
