the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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