But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Randomize
