he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
this must be what syphilis tastes like
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
