she was so not down for the gang bang
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
